I am single yet again for another Valentine’s Day and this year I’m going with the openly bitter approach. I’ve always tried to be cheerful at my inability to a.) keep a boyfriend through the Winter or b.) get a boyfriend at all. I feel inept when it comes to this whole boy girl thing. I can’t even tell when someone likes me because I still think, why would that person like me? Even though I know, regardless of what I look like I’m a pretty awesome person and I deserve love and all that, but for so long that’s been my mindset, the friend, the little sister because the object of my affection or desire went for someone else. Some thinner, prettier, taller, just er of everything I was and am. I swear one day I’m going to look back and think of all the time I’m wasting measuring myself up to someone else and kick myself.
So it Valentine’s Day and I’m going to turn on my Etta James' Love Song album and sink into a bit of a funk and give the rose bouquets the evil eye and mentally spit on all pink red and white candy and let Miss James lull me into the seductiveness of self pity/hate that I know so well…until 6pm. At 6 I’m getting dolled up and going to get my free salsa lesson and drink downtown. Gotcha! I bet you thought I was going to go all crazy and cry and wear old sweatpants and wait outside CVS until the Valentine’s candy went to half off and eat them all, except the coconut ones.
My eating has been good, since I’m still with the coffee I got some fat free creamer and I had half a lemon poppy seed muffin at my niece’s school for a “VIP Breakfast” Luckily all the bagels and donuts were gone, I think I was the only one happy about that. Since then, coffee with a quarter cup of fat free sweet Italian crème and 3 splenda, an apple, a banana, an orange, Lean Cuisine BBQ Chicken Quesadilla, 8 pumpernickel pretzel sticks and a bag of skittles. Yes skittles, it kept me off the chocolate M&Ms. The quesadilla was fine, I would recommend a salad with it because it’s tasty, but not a lot of food, but I feel for 7 grams of fat there should just be more.
The gym is still a no go with work, but hopefully I will dance some calories away, but I’ve kind of resigned myself to no gym for a while and got a lot of fruits and veggies to fill me without it begging too much. But I did buy a jump rope and I have a groupon for running shoes. I will be back out there and you will find me running outside this spring. The thought of that just makes me smile.
Last Post’s Comments:
Doc, it’s been hard finding the elusive Honey Crisp, but my office manager gave me one for Valentine’s Day, she said she found them at Shoppers so I have that to look forward to for a snack. I had a braeburn this afternoon and it was sweet, juicy and crispy, I feel like a whole new world has been opened up to me with these apples (I’m still not down with them being cooked). If you haven’t, you should try a Korean pear. It is like an apple made a baby with a pear, a big baby. I use to only be able to find them at my Asian/international markets, but I think some chains carry them on occasion.