I got nothing to say for myself or my absence. I’m sure as no surprise to anyone that I have gain most of my weight loss weight back. I stopped doing the things that helped me reach my goals. I stopped blogging; I was hiding from the gain and the embarrassment of it. And what a shame, I was starting to feel like I had a little family here. But when I checked back in I saw my peers on a steady path to their goals and it made me feel like shit that I wasn't progressing with them. So I did what any sane person would do, I beat myself up about it and ate my feelings. How does one not lose weight this way?!?
My birthday is a week away (turning 30 for the third time) and the dress I had last year that I was almost in is back to its purchase fit. Sausage in casing doesn’t quite describe the look I have going in that dress and biscuit in a can (the kind that pop out of the roll-got the visual?) is a bit more accurate. So that goal will not be met this birthday. Heavy sigh. Anyway, a New Year is upon and I loathe making New Year’s resolutions, so I need to get on it now. A December Resolution! December’s a good month, it has my birthday, baby Jesus’ birthday and my name day oh and New Year’s Eve!
I don’t want you to think I’ve done nothing. I finished my last semester a community college and got accepted to George Mason University. And my friend, Céline and I have been working the C25K, but outside this time. It has been hard and the number of times I’m jazzed and excited to tackle each session has been outnumbered by the times I’ve dreaded them and cursed the run between breathes, but it feels good to complete a run. We’re running the Chocolate 5/15K in the National Harbor this Saturday. I look forward to running it with her. It’s one of the things we’re doing for my birthday.
I should have a December Resolution or two by the first, which means I have some things to do, like weigh myself, stop crying, resist the urge to medicate the knowledge of said number and the balls to accept that number and share it. I’m also taking recommendations for calorie counting/food journal sites. I’d like one with an app and with the capability to post daily journals here and hopefully I will soon be able to go back to LA Boxing. I miss feeling like a bad ass.